The Israel Defense Forces decided to revise its procedure regarding unmarried partners of fallen soldiers, after fiancees and girlfriends of soldiers who were killed in during Operation Protective Edge in the Gaza Strip learned of their partners' deaths from family members and even from the media, rather than from army officials. "I'm sure my father didn't want to be the one to tell me that Paz was killed," said Ella Bar, the girlfriend of Lt. Paz Eliyahu, who was killed during the Gaza campaign. "It was very hard for him." A tearful Bar spoke at a meeting of the Knesset Committee on the Status of Women on Wednesday. "I'm glad he was there for me, but in retrospect, it was really problematic. It affected my relationship with my parents." Col. Yaffa Mor, of the IDF Personnel Directorate's Casualty Division, told the committee that as part of the changes the military has instated, the partners of unmarried soldiers who are killed in the line of duty will be notified of the death by an IDF official. They will also be entitled to a special leave, to allow them to observe the traditional seven-day mourning period. Committee Chairwoman MK Aliza Lavie (Yesh Atid) called the meeting saying, "The difficult circumstances that unfolded during Operation Protective Edge have forced us to deal with this issue, which cannot ne neglected further. The military cannot simply refuse a request made by the parents of a fallen soldier to deliver an official notice [of death] to his girlfriend, his partner or his fiancee." Lavie explained that, "We want to use the procedure the IDF has in place for notifying grandparents and siblings and apply it to girlfriends as well. A girlfriend considered by [the fallen soldier's] parents to be a member of the immediate family will be notified by the military. "Similarly, we must be sensitive to the girlfriends' needs during the period immediately following the death, during the funeral and shiva [mourning period]. It is crucial for their recovery" from the loss, she said. According to Phyllis Heimowitz, the director of the Non-Profit Organization for Emotional Support of Girlfriends and Fiancees of Fallen Soldiers of the Israel Defense Forces, about half of the soldiers killed in Operation Protective Edge were also survived by girlfriends, many of whom had plans to get married.
